EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

So what is effective communication?  Is it using the right words?  Is it having the right tone of voice or is it body posture, facial expressions and gestures?

Well you might be surprised to know that the impact of your communication is focused more on how you look than what you actually say!

The reality is, that only 7% of your impact is based upon the words that you use.  Yes that’s just 7%!  55% of your impact is related to your facial expressions, body posture and gestures and 38% is voice tone.  So, that old saying “it’s not what you say but the way that you say it”, is more true than you realized!

So what can you do to improve your communication skills?  Well, perhaps the best place to start is with first impressions.  Your first impression is your first opportunity to communicate with someone.  If you arrive late, flustered and poorly organized, what are you communicating?  If you mumble or whisper, how do you come across?  If you want to get your first opportunity to communicate right, arrive on time and properly prepared.  Look directly and confidently at the person/people you are communicating with.  You are your message!  All parts of you need to be working in harmony; words, pictures and sounds.  If you don’t look as if you believe what you’re saying, why should anyone else believe you?  Sincerity is communicated with voice tone and appreciation of other’s feelings, not just in words.  How often have we heard someone say ‘sorry’ and know that they don’t mean it at all!

Ensure that you are taking a genuine interest in what the other person is saying to you.  Look at them when they are talking to you, pick up on key words and phrases and build them into your own responses, this lets the other person know that you have really listened to what they have said.  Mirror their body posture as this creates rapport.  If they cross their legs, cross your legs, if they nod and smile, you nod and smile.  Identify their breathing pace and breath unison with them.

In any communication situation, engage your brain before your mouth!  Before you speak, think about the result that you want and tailor your speech and behavior towards achieving that outcome.  Sometimes you may have to lose a battle to win the war!

Final word of warning!

Ensure your intent is good one!  Although you should tailor your behavior to create a better chance of achieving your outcome, this should be based upon a good intent.  Check in with yourself to check your intent is in fact good otherwise you could be perceived as selfish, self serving and manipulative!  There is a fine line between utilizing your communication skills in the most effective way to achieve a positive outcome and being manipulative!